Good golly! Will this ever end? I can’t get near my computer without getting barraged by every campaign, email, ad, video, and commentary that is posted on the upcoming election. Adding insult to injury, I can hardly resist forwarding the juiciest specimens on to every person that might not end up feeling alienated by my slant. Oddly enough, I have recently been culled from some address books. Spam-I-Am? I think not!
Forget about television… the late night pundits are having a field day with this carnival we call democracy. In lieu of opiates, I am reduced to reruns of The Honeymooners and I Love Lucy in order to obtain the mind-numbing effects that only B&W sitcoms of yore can provide, seeing as they embody a kinder, more gentler time in America. Besides, who can afford an opiate habit with this economy?
I refused to go out on Halloween this past weekend because the streets and dance halls were teeming with people dressed in myriad versions of She-whose-name-shall-not-be-spoken. I was afraid I might end up in the clink for accidentally goin’ Cheney and capping one them in the face.
Even the Canadians got in on the act when they punk’d one of the VP candidates on live radio this weekend. It was one of those horrible moments when you. can’t. stop. listening. Mortification doesn’t even begin to describe the range of emotions that qualify for this Alaskan girl’s experience…
Be that as it may, I aim to be hopeful that sometime between November 4th and Christmas we will not only know who won the big battle, but that we will no longer care so much either. Methinks that the phenomenon of reality TV has somehow granted Americans carte blanche with everyone else’s business and, well, yuk. It just ain’t right. Besides, in the end it really won’t matter who wins or loses this race (I ain’t no Pollyanna, even if I do harbor some not-so-secret fantasies that people are basically good) because the funky stench in the wake will linger on for a long time to come. Why? Because 9-11 desensitized us to everything ugly. Innocence was lost that day and will never return as long as we perpetuate the mass media. And I, for one, ain’t no quitter!
So, go to the polls on Tuesday. Do your thing. Cast your vote. Exercise your blessed freedom to do so. And then, please please please, can we get back to the important stuff like sex and booze and fishing?